Went for a ride in the cruiser last night after a visit to moby's teeny hole

i'm now a junior at BMCC

jwass invaded my head for a moment and nearly forced me into a very awkward jean jamming faux pas

DANGER

Shia Has a Plan To Keep His HED

Apparently Shia LaBeouf doesn't want his lover to move either, so here's his plan to keep her in town!

“I get into poetry and songwriting,” Shia laughs. “I’ve flown across the country with flowers to hand-deliver, and I’ve made trails out of rose petals and put on the Jodeci music. I’ve also been known to put on some Meatloaf, which is so cheesy. I won’t say if it worked or not, but it was very funny!”

Not without a Spotter!

Official town rule: All members of the socialist Every ManniPenny Person's Gym must have a spotter at all times. Whether you're on a treadmill, lifting weights, or trying out a unicycle, you must have a spotter. If you cannot locate a spotter, the court will appoint you one. If you should waive your right to a spotter, you will have to stay on the mats and risk ring worm among other fungal infections associated with group use of sweat absorbing materials.

Straight Up

Our benefactor, Mr. Moby, says:

"Britney Spears like this Tennessee Williams tragic figure. The fatter she gets, the weirder she gets, the more I love her. I found her moderately appealing in the late ’90s, but now I would marry her in a heartbeat.”